Hi there. I’m Claire. I’ve often been told that writing can soothe the soul and sometimes can offer a peace of mind like no other. A narration on life. Here’s mine.

Claire was born in 1983 on a snowy day in February. How does she know this? Because her grandad told her every single birthday. She had blue eyes, skin that was whiter than snow with freckles all over, and black curly ringlet hair. This, I’m told is typical Irish skin..

My dad met my mum when I was young. Aged 4-6 I’d say. Bio dad wasn’t around for one reason or another. Not a bad thing. It is what it is. Anyway. My mum and Dad had my brother (step brother if we’re being technical but whatever) in 1992. In 1994, my dad was killed in a motorcycle accident. I know, shitty. Don’t worry thought, the story gets better and worse and maybe worse again. Possibly a little better again. We’ll see.

Mum met a great guy who became my Step Dad, Stu. I didn’t really take to him at first. In fact, I was a complete and utter a$$. In the end we got along and I soon gained another sister and brother. Yay!

Teenage years ensued. Hormones, exams, boyfriends, heartache, illnesses, college, hormones, alcohol infused fun, more exams… Then in 2001 I met my future husband, Dan. It became serious quite quickly and we became engaged Christmas 2002. Marriage happened in 2004. I was 21 and he was 24. We were young but our wedding was amazing.

Dan worked hard and became a Police Officer with Greater Manchester Police. Something he had wanted to do for a long time. I, on the other hand, had no idea what I wanted to do. So, I went to work in a bank. His job was crazy, scary, always had something exciting. Mine? Talking to people who had more money than I did.

In 2007, we moved to a place called Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. Dan was offered a job with Edmonton Police Service. He was excited, proud and hopeful for our new future in a new country. I was excited, proud and petrified.

In 2008 we moved into our first home. Braved Edmonton’s harsh -30 winters and basked in the +30 summers. 2008 was the year that we welcomed a tiny little human, extensively argued over his name but eventually settled with Gabe. Not Gabriel. Simply, Gabe. The nights were sleepless, the days filled with fun and the home gradually started to look like Babies R Us. For some Godforsaken reason- must have been the hormones-another tiny human was welcomed in 2010. The boy kind, again! This was not how it was meant to pan out. I was meant to have a girl. I was sure that he was going to be a girl!! What on earth was I going to do with another boy?! We kept him all the same. What’s a little more testosterone in the house. Callen was the name eventually chosen for him. Not Call-um… Not Cay-len… C-allen.

Life was wonderful. And busy. I changed jobs-multiple times and at one point had both a full time and a part time job. Dan was getting promotions in work and the kids were in childcare daily. We had our rough patches, like any marriage, and we had our sunny skies. The roller coaster of life.

June 8, 2015, he died. Dan died.

He was killed by a man that had lost himself. This- man-was being arrested and Dan was- in professional terms-executing an arrest warrant. This-man-fired roughly 60 bullets from inside his home, killing Dan instantly. Other officers were injured, but Dan was the only officer to lose his life. There had been no officer killed on duty for 25 years in Edmonton. The city rallied around us in a way I cannot begin to put into words. He was deemed a hero of the city and we were humbled by their love, compassion and protection of us.

January 2017, I name the decision to bring our children back to Manchester. Back to where our story began. Back to the huge family the boys didn’t know they really had.

I’m praying I don’t screw this up,

Claire x